B is for Bottle Spells – Pagan Blog Project 2012

Before I identified as a “pagan” or a “neo-pagan” or an “animist” or as “goddess practitioner” or any of the other categories I’ve applied to myself over the years, I identified as a Witch. Not, I add emphatically, as a Wiccan. I don’t think I ever was a Wiccan. But a witch? You bet.
And I defined “witch”, in significant (though not entire) part, as “someone who casts spells; someone who does spell-craft”.

And the spells I do, when I do them, are very much the magical counterpart to my method of cooking. Meaning “What do I have in the fridge?” – although, in the case of spell-craft, it becomes “what do I have in the fridge/cupboard/yarn-bag/beading-kit/etc”. But you get the general idea.

I’ve done magical guerilla knitting (still in progress), and I’ve done wammy-sachets (ages ago), and I’ve done bottle spells. And, by the looks of things, I’m actually kind of good at bottle spells.

Now, I grant you, I’ve only made, like, two of them, and they’ve both been honey-pots. But I’ve made them, and they seem to do the trick.

As far as I understand it, a bottle spell works on either attraction or repulsion.
So if, say, someone in my office[1] is a Horrible Person who goes in for passive aggression, sabotage, malicious gossip[2], or even just eating up your time in a way that is fucking with my own career path, and talking to them about it is only making things worse (and/or I don’t want to waste any more breath on them)…
I could grab some of their hair[4] from off the back of their office chair while they were out of their cubical and either (A) do a honey-pot spell to bring them their dream job[5] OR, (B) I could do a banishing bottle to get them to go the fuck away[6]. Alternatively, I could (C) do a spell on my own cubical and basically work a “don’t look here[7]”… though I’m less sure as to how to do that (I think it involves amaranth and shielding, but I could be wrong) OR (D) make a honey pot for myself (using my own hair, which is easier to get ahold of) and get ME my dream job Somewhere Else[8] the hell away from my irritating and malicious co-worker.

Lots of options.

I like bottle spells.
I like them because they’re simple to do and you can do them on the fly, largely with whatever’s lying around.
Like most kitchen-magic, they’re basically designed be done when they’re needed, rather than having to wait for the appropriate moon phase or planetary alignment. (Shoaling notwithstanding, I’m not at all a Chaos Magician or any of the other designations found at (what I think is) the more ceremonial end of the spectrum).
I like them because they suit my temperament well.

Meliad the Birch Maiden

[1] I don’t actually work at an office, so I figure this is a safe example since my non-existent co-workers are likely to freak out about what I’m theoretically up to.

[2] I differentiate between “gossip” – which gets a bad rap specifically because it’s a mode of information-sharing that isn’t controlled by The Powers That Be[3], but is actually just fine – and “malicious gossip” which is, like, character assassination, tattling, and the kind of triangulation where the point is to break up alliances.

[3] Who gets accused of gossip? Women. Poor people. Mexicans. See what I mean?

[4] Yes, I said “get some of their hair”. By nefarious and secretive means, no less. Deal.

[5] Somewhere else – possibly by including a small map of Argentina or something.

[6] Depending on what I put in the bottle, I could probably get them badly hurt, but I’d rather not have that on my hands, so… “away”.

[7] Why, yes, I do read the October Daye series by Seanan McGuire. How did you know?

[8] Like, say, a writing career featuring magic, recipes, polyamoury, and kink…

3 responses to “B is for Bottle Spells – Pagan Blog Project 2012

  1. How would I go about doing a money spell?

    • You can put a quarter (or a toonie, or whatever) in the bottom of your sugar bowl.
      You can mix up some sugar-water in a glass and set it on top of a coin (biggest denomination you’ve got) and refill it every time the water evaporates
      (In the case of the above, it’s the sweetness of the sugar that acts as a drawing agent).
      I tend to do honey-pots for employment/income rather than money in general, but they work the same way. Throw some copper (if you’ve got a penny from before the 1990s, you’re probably good on that front, plus the coin aspect helps) into a small mason jar (like half a cup) add a few bits and bobs that imply wealth to you – I throw pecans in because they’re for employment, but whatever works for you (basil + various types of agate – maybe moss agate? – might be a place to start) and other bits and bobs that suggest how you want to acrue that wealth (are you looking for work? In a particular field? Do you want to win a lottery? Maybe a newspaper cut-out of the winning numbers, or items the correspond to luck, would be suitable). Once you’ve got that done, pop a tea-light on top and burn it all the way down. Do that every week, and it should start funneling dribs and drabs of cash your way. Good luck!

  2. Pingback: M is for Motherwort – Pagan Blog Project 2013 | Urban Meliad

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