Daily Archives: November 23, 2012

You Gotta Get Up And Try

So. Miss Sugar talks, sometimes, about “radiomancy”. Basically, you flip through the radio channels and see what lyrics jump out at you, what songs are really resonating, stuff like that, and it can give you insights into what’s on the line in your life Right Now.
What I’ve been listening to a lot is this:

The dance routine is gorgeous, albeit slightly horrifying in terms of what it’s depicting (especially when coupled with those lyrics). BUT. The actual words of the chorus were hitting me pretty hard.
Where there is desire
There’s gonna be a flame;
Where there is a flame
Someone’s bound to get burned.
Just because it burns
Doesn’t mean you’re gonna die,
You gotta get up and try.

Taken on their own, they read as being about taking risks.
Given how much vulnerability (and shame and all the stuff that goes along with it) has been eating my brain of late, I can’t help but read those words as a bit of a personal reminder to Stop Hiding and Get Open on a number of fronts where I’ve been inclined to wall myself off of late.
I was reading Wren Doloro’s post about wanting a Shame-Free New Moon. It has a link to this ritual, which I may have to try.
But it also led me to Brene Brown’s talks on vulnerability and shame.
And maybe that’s why those lines from the song are sticking out so much for me.
But there’s such a link between fear and shame; fear of vulnerability and refusal to take risks; fear of getting hurt, shame over being “weak” because it’s possible to hurt you, and refusal to be vulnerable.
“Getting vulnerable” can feel, so often, like “Take off your armor and LET someone hurt you”. And I have to remember that it can also mean “Take off your mask and let someone actually get to know you.” Not a suicide run, but a risk.
Just because it burns
Doesn’t mean you’re gonna die

It’s possible to get close to that flame, to take off all the protective layers and come out from behind my walls, and… yeah, potentially get singed bcause of it.
But I can try.